I’ll be forward with you. If you’ve seen the trailers and any ounce of you thought this movie would be cursed, you are absolutely right. He’s All That is everything you’d expect. Blatant product placement, a poorly written script, and bad-at-best acting are what you’ll get. Critically, it’s the dumpster fire that ruined Christmas and now your mom is looking for a way to politely ask you to move out. But if you activate your ULTRA, MEGA, CHURCH’S BISCUIT CINEMA GLASSES you’re in for a masterpiece. SO STRAP IN AND GRAB YOUR CLOSEST BUCKET OF KFC 8 PIECE DARK MEAT CHICKEN.
ULTRA, MEGA, McDONALD’S BIG MAC CINEMA GLASSES ACTIVATE
He’s All That follows TikTok star Padgett Sawyer (Addison Rae), who is fortunate enough to have a name that sounds like random redneck sounds. After a social media downfall involving French pastries and a cooked-out Derek Hough, Padgett makes a bet with her friend to turn photographer and nihilist Cameron Kweller (Tanner Buchanan) into a star. Plot important hijinks ensue as well as a few HWUH moments. Accumulating to a bombastic finale of legendary proportions.
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Rae is a tour de force in the Netflix original movie He’s All That. She must have memorized a minimum of five to six words. All big in size and length, but words nonetheless. Tanner Buchanan also says a few words and those words were DEFINITELY words too. Never has a movie used words such as the ones found in He’s All That. My favorite words were definitely Bose, Pizza Hut, and TikTok. Truly remarkable stuff.
There is a beautiful marriage of ideas in play here. Making a remake of an adaptation of some lame play about a Greek guy and TikTok is immaculate. The only thing that could top it is Kanye West’s newest song sampling a YouTube landmark. The writers must have had a blast incorporating dated ideas and references in a modern context. Also, utilizing actors from the original movie such as Rachel Leigh Cook and Matthew Lillard is a great way to remind people this movie is a remake of another movie. I would have forgotten!!! If it weren’t for those silly gooses!!
hype glasses becomes loose due to sweating over thinking about Matthew Lillard
I don’t hold any malice towards anyone in this production. I imagine they’re all kind people and I have an understanding that the process to make something isn’t exactly the easiest. With that said, this movie is disingenuous. Making a movie where your protagonist is the “salt of the Earth” who is enamored by her image and what people think due to toxic internet standards is fine, it’s been done. When you have said protagonist played by an individual that perpetuates said culture and is the polar opposite of the “salt of the Earth” that’s where it gets muddy. Again, I’m sure Addison Rae is a kind person, this isn’t intended to be an attack on her. But no one should accept the absence of self-awareness for a multi-million dollar movie.
Furthermore, this movie’s message on self-image is dangerous to young viewers. Teenagers that come across this movie shouldn’t walk away thinking their image is dependent on factors outside of their control. Image is a sacred thing and should be something everyone is conscientious about. Self-worth and image should be derived from themselves and not be a derivative of other people’s thoughts and ideas. Not to say all parts of this movie’s message are dangerous, rejecting how the internet perceives you is important. Self-worth is much more than what you see through a screen. But how much makeup a woman wears and whether or not a man accepts it should not be important.
If you’re not walking into this embodying “where’s my hug” mentality you won’t enjoy this. Although I have my issues, maintaining an objective lens and being able to spot the problematic parts will give you some mild form of fulfillment. If you’re reading this and you enjoyed the movie I’m happy for you. Movies are for everyone, even ones I may not like (contrary to popular belief). – Jacob Mauceri
Rating: Put your phones away/10
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